Just who will i be?

It just feels like the other day when i was thinking: "What do i want to be when i grow up?" because all my friends seemed sure about their futures. They wanted to be doctors, lawyers, teachers, politicians. Me, I didn’t have a clue.

I hated breaking it to myself, but i am already grown up.
This year it is exactly 10 years since i have matriculated - time certainly passed by quicker than i every could imagine!
My dreams are certainly not over yet, in fact, I just realized that I am still a work in progress and I am writing my next act now.

The past couple of weeks I had to think all over again: “What do I want to be when I am all grown up”

It wasn’t just “WHAT do I want to be when I’m grow up?” It was, “WHO will I be? WHO is the person I want to be? Who is the ME I’ll become? Who am I?”

I have realized that past year or so I have been defined by the work I am doing instead of the life I am living.
I have given 200% of my time to my work and in the process at times stopped living my dream, but who can blame me?
I have been given the opportunity to work for one of the most powerful brands in the world, but I have to ask myself the question – did the brand become too powerful for me?
With a combination of self-deprecation and chutzpah, I can describe myself as the consummate overachiever, a people-pleasing, legacy-carrying, perfection-seeking girl.

A couple of weeks I stood at a function and it suddenly became clear – I am being incarnated as someone I am totally not!
Standing still, I suddenly found the room spinning around me. I was awakened by fake smiles, flashing cameras and reality… this is not the life I intend to live!
I started asking who I am and who are my true friends?

You know, the say: “ Your are the same today than you will be in 5 years from now except for the people with whom you associate with and the books I read.”
I have been associated with many people throughout my life, but only a handful I can call my true friends.
It might seem that all I do is work, attend events, meet fabulous people and live the life, but I am so much more than that.
I wonder how many people know that I love simple things in life – like children, a home cooked meal from my mom, afternoon naps, experiencing new things, ice cream, reading, staying in my PJ’s the whole day in bed, listening, rains, the wonder of spring, crying, laugh until my belly hurts and just being normal – living a no fuzzed life?

I wonder how many people know that my greatest pleasure in life is to be around family and friends and that my biggest dream is to be a mom?

I wonder how many of us invest time in other people? Do you?
Did you know, the best thing you can do for anyone else is improve yourself: what I mean by this is simply this: if you improve yourself and make yourself a better person this will allow you to bring other people up with you and in return make them a better person?

There are most definitely more important things in life to worry about than what to wear next, who to impress best and what has been written about you in the stars.
Tonight I will be worrying about someone very important in my life; tonight I will be saying a prayer for my mom because tomorrow she might stand a chance in facing another big operation.
After my prayers I will be counting my blessings. I will not look at what is not, but at what is and be thankful for all that I have.
I have to ask myself again, who is this person I want to become and how to I want to enrich the lives of others around me?

I want to chase my dream and I want to make my dreams come true – that is the pursuit of happiness