I Miss You

I
Miss
you
so
much
every
single
day!!

Tell me you also cried....

The most beautiful wedding vows....

Today is the day my life begins. All my life, I've been just me, just a smart-mouthed kid. Today I become a man. Today I become a husband. Today I become accountable to someone other than myself. Today I become accountable to you, to our future, to all possibilities that our marriage has to offer. Together, no matter what happens, I'll be ready. For anything. For everything. To take on life. To take on love. To take on possibility and responsibility. Today, Izzie Stevens, our life together begins. And I for one, can't wait.

Betrayal

BETRAY

Definition of betray: Betrayal is the breaking or violation of a presumptive social contract, trust, or confidence that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

We often look for someone that we can trust more than we can trust ourselves.
Perhaps this is because we know how often we betray ourselves.
I lately realized again that the people in my life who are the most trustworthy are those who tell the truth, even when the truth is hard.

When the trust that is important to us is broken, we feel hurt and angry.
If the trust is broken but we or the other person pretend that it has not been violated, we learn to distrust ourselves or party involved when the truth is revealed.

However, the real damage of betrayal is in the lies we tell one another and ourselves, the lies that cause us to lose faith in our ability to recognize and act on the truth.

However, in some ways, betrayal is inevitable. When we betray each other, the path to recovery is less clear. We do whatever it takes to rebuild the trust that was lost. And then there are some wounds, some betrayals... that are so deep, so profound that there is no way to repair what was lost. And when that happens, there's nothing left to do but wait.

These are the choices we make, consciously or unconsciously and yet ultimately, if we can be still enough with what is, we can find the place of choiceless awareness.

I want to know, can you do this?
Can you make the choice without putting yourself or the other person – out of your heart?

I need to make this decision. I need to take the leap of faith and put these people out of my heart for good – even when it hurts.
This pain – I just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers, I just breathe deep and wait for it to subside.

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long.

I am tired; I am scared, denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later I have to put aside my denial and face the world.
At the end of the day, there are some things I just can't help but talk about.
Some things I just don't want to hear and some things I say because I can't be silent any longer.

So this is it. My heart is broken by the betrayal and I need to make the choice in moving on and forget about it.

FTV SANDTON - Official After Party Venue for Arise Africa Fashion Week

FTV Sandton is the official party venue for ARISE Africa Fashion Week
ARISE Africa Fashion Week showcases the continents leading fashion designers

Johannesburg, 27 May 2009- The organisers of Johannesburg, Cape Town and Durban Fashion Weeks- African Fashion International- have announced that they will be showcasing Africa’s leading fashion designers at the upcoming ARISE Africa Fashion Week. The event will take place at the Sandton Convention Centre in Johannesburg from the 12 to 20 June 2009.

Fashion TV Sandton, well-known social hotspot, will be the official party venue- entertaining glamorous models, fashion designers and the ‘who’s who’ of the fashion and entertainment industry.

According to Lorinda Voges, National Group Marketing Manager for FTV, “much of what the FTV brand represents will be showcased at the ARISE African Fashion Week, making FTV Sandton the perfect host for the official after party.”

ARISE Africa Fashion Week is a sponsorship agreement with ARISE magazine. Produced in the United Kingdom and distributed internationally, the acclaimed magazine features African style and culture.

“ARISE Africa Fashion Week is a great stage to showcase South Africa’s talent and unique African style. FTV have always been a keen supporter of home-grown talent. We recently named Priyeshka Lutchman Miss FTV Africa 2009, where she will go on to compete for the coveted international title,” says Voges.

“ARISE Africa Fashion Week is another example of where the rest of the world can focus on Africa and what we have achieved in the fashion industry,” she adds.

Nduka Obaigbena, group chairman and editor-in-chief of ARISE, said “The partnership with African Fashion International (AFI) is a continued celebration of African achievement and an extension of our commitment to recognize and showcase the very best of African creative talent.”

ARISE Africa Fashion Week is set to bring all fashionistas to the centre of Johannesburg in order to catch a glimpse of the fashion collections, exhibitions, trade and entertainment.

Halo - Beyonce

Remember those walls I built
Well baby they're tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make a sound
I found a way to let you in
But I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now

It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm takin'
I ain't never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
Woah...

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
I swore I'd never fall again
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me back to the ground again

It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
The risk that I'm takin'
I'm never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

SONGFACT:

This song, which describes a love that is so phenomenal that it is heavenly, was written by Ryan Tedder, who previously wrote "Bleeding Love." The tune was originally earmarked for "Bleeding Love" singer Leona Lewis. However the British singer was unable to find the time to record the song so it was passed to Beyoncé, a decision that reportedly left her mentor Simon Cowell fuming.

Fix You - Coldplay

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

MEANING OF THIS SONG:

This song deals with true love, helping someone in your time of need, and learning from your mistakes. Coldplay lead singer Chris Martin hasn't spoken about the specific inspiration for the song, but it could be directed to his wife, Gwyneth Paltrow, who was dealing with the death of her father in 2002. In USA Today, Martin did say where the song started: "My father-in-law Bruce Paltrow bought this big keyboard just before he died. No one had ever plugged it in. I plugged it in, and there was this incredible sound I'd never heard before. All these songs poured out from this one sound. Something has to inspire you, and something else takes over. It's very cloudy."

Grey's Anatomy the Proposal Derek and Meredith from Elevator Love Letters

Richard makes Meredith wait for the elevator and when the doors open, she sees why: A clean-shaven Derek is inside and the elevator is decorated with scans of all the surgeries they did together. He recounts the stages of their relationships as they played out during each case. Lastly, he shows her the post-op scan of Izzie's brain. "You got me into the OR," he tells her. "You put the rest of us to work because you've seen worse. You know we'll survive. You say you're dark and twisty, but that's not a weakness, it's a strength. It makes you who you are. I love you Meredith Grey, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"And I want to spend the rest of my life with you," she says, and they kiss.

Sasha's F1 GP update - 24 May 2009

The Jenni Button show continued through the streets of Monaco yesterday. Brawn Gp’s Button scored his 5th victory out of 6 races this season with an emphatic and disciplined drive through the narrow streets of the principality. His teammate Rubens Barrichello finished second to score the teams 3rd one two this season. Déjà Vu back to 2004 when Ferrari had a similar run. I think Brawn could well re-write the history books this season. They are so strong, so reliable and their drivers know how to do the job. It is immense.

The expected challenge from Red Bull Racing failed to materialise and the best of the rest was actually Ferrari who scored their best result this season. Kimi finished 3rd and Massa fourth for a much needed boost for the Italian marque.

World Champion Lewis Hamilton had a nightmare weekend when he crashed during Qualifying and had to start at the back of the field. Despite a light fuel load, Hamilton could not do anything around the streets of Monaco and also tapped Nick Heidfeld’s BMW during the race. It is the second race in a row that the leading car has lapped the World Champion. Talk is that Lewis is looking for a PR guru to boost his wailing image.

The rest of the point scorers were Red Bull’s Mark Webber, William’s Nico Rosberg, Renault’s Fernando Alonso and a much needed boost for the under pressure Sebastien Bourdais for Toro Rosso.

Although the Monaco GP can be processional due to the nature of the circuit, it still is the most important race on the calendar and the one race that every driver wants to win. Jenson Button is a winner in Monaco now and the title must surely be within his grasp. Just to give you an idea of the Brawn Gp’s performance and reliability. This race saw Jenson Button use the same Mercedes engine for the third race in a row without any problems at all. The drivers are limited to 8 engines for the season. Brawn are only on their 2nd engine. BMW in contrast have used 5 engines already for Robert Kubica.

This week is crunch time for the teams and the FIa to iron out their differences. Late last night, FOTA sent a letter to the FIA’s Max Moseley requesting that next year's regulations be scrapped if the teams are to commit their future to the sport. It is a complicated situation but I am confident that a compromise will be found..perhaps not by the end of this week though.

So, F1 continues and in two weeks the teams will race in Istanbul around one of the most exciting new circuits on the calendar. Can anyone even challenge the Brawn’s let alone beat them... I doubt it but they will give it their all in effort.

Beauty

Beauty is a summation of the parts working together in such a way that nothing is needed to be added, taken away or altered

The Planets Bend Between Us

The winters mar the earth
It's floor was frozen glass
You slip into my arms
And you quickly correct yourself
Your freezing speech bubbles
Seem to hold your words aloft
I want the smoky clouds of laughter
To swim about me forever more

I will race you to the waterside
And from the edge of ireland shout out loud
So they could hear it in america
It's all for you

The shells crack under our shoes
Like punctuation points
The planets bend between us
A hundred million suns and stars
The sea filled in this silence
Before you sank those words
And now even in the darkness
I can see how happy you are

I will race you to the waterside
And from the edge of ireland shout out loud
So they could hear it in a america
It's all for you

Character

Good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent. Most talents are, to some extent, a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it, piece by piece -- by thought, choice, courage, and determination.

Sasha's F1 GP update - 10 May 2009

I love F1 because people can be so fickle. Let me explain. As recently as 5 years ago if Ferrari won 4 out of 5 races the world criticised the sport, the FIa, the rules, the Pope, the whoever they could.... now 5 years on another teams has won 4 out of the first 5 and the world is quiet..Isn’t it peculiar?

What a turn around this season has become. Nowhere can you find names like Ferrari, Renault, Toyota, and McLaren competing for wins in the most prestigious of motorsports. It’s about Brawn GP and Red bull racing. Who, what....and I think it is not bad for the sport however there must a load of people who listen to their sports reports on Mondays and wonder who and what these teams are. We are like that; we like to identify with something. If you say Toyota you can understand what it is but if you say Brawn it doesn’t really mean much unless you have an interest in the sport. Just a reference point, Brawn GP has 68 points, McLaren 13 and Ferrari 6th. Ferrari has won 9 out of the 10 past Constructors titles

Yesterday’s Spanish GP saw Ross Brawn weave his magic and change strategies to allow Jenson to leapfrog his teammate and score more points in a bid to claim the title. Ross Brawn knows what it takes to win and he will guide his team that way until he feels no one can catch them. Rubens Barrichello will not take it lying down but he will create problems if he doesn’t toe the line; however he has to be quicker than Jenson which won’t be easy. The one great thing for Jenson Button is his consistency. He has not made one mistake and is driving well within himself. I don’t even think that Brawn have shown their full potential as yet.

Having said all that, Brawn GP are completely dominating F1. RBR may be the next best team but they are going to have win at least another 3 races to even get close to being on an even keel with Brawn.

There were some surprises and some disappointments this weekend. Toyota and McLaren were disappointing but the encouraging thing for the tifosi was that Ferrari seem to have made a major step forward but they need to solve their reliability problems and they need more petrol....

So, all bets off. Button will be WC. A bit disappointing to have to announce it after only 5 races but it seems that way. I wonder how man of Schumacher’s records he will break as well

The Hottest Track right now

Tequila Fest with FTV Sandton & Sasha Martinengo

FTV Sandton Tequila Festival 2009


Fashion TV parties are known worldwide as high-class events with the most beautiful women and best music. All major Fashion TV parties in South Africa are recorded and broadcasted over FTV in South Africa and FTV Internationally. All over the world, celebrities, fashionistas and models alike are flocking to the fashion TV venues to meet and mingle with the “who’s who” of the fashion and entertainment industries. Every major city has one, acting as a stage for showcasing fashion shows, star interviews and VIP parties

Fashion TV Lounge Sandton is proud to announce the first Tequila Festival with our host,
DJ Sasha Martinengo. Sasha is understandably a South African radio heavyweight, who has been with 5fm for 14 years, and the promoter of the very popular Tequila Tuesday.
The nightly events will take place every Thursday night during the month of May at FTV Sandton.

The 2009 kick-off party will take place on Thursday 7 May.

The US and Mexico are the biggest markets in the world for Tequila. Outside these two massive markets, SA rates amongst the top emerging markets for Tequila in the world. Although SA is still developing in terms of consumption behaviour and education we are making positive strides.
Cuervo is the number 1 selling Tequila in the world, and therefore also our preferred Brand of choice for the festival. Established in 1795 Cuervo is still a family owned business and is one of the oldest, largest and most respected producers of tequila in the world. For more than 2 decades Cuervo has been providing consumers with exceptional quality products.
The main focus of the festival is to educate our consumers about tequila and how to enjoy it responsibly. Cuervo will be doing tequila tastings, promotions and big giveaways at every event. VIP sections are available for group bookings, or guests can book for dinner to secure their place in the venue.
Fashion TV Sandton is renowned for our internationally associated component and hosts a bevy of fashionably first events and exclusive gatherings. With customers from both the celebrity arena as well as the high spending fraternities, Fashion TV promises the visitor to the venue a first class experience.

More Info or bookings contact: Michelle Leibrandt on 011 7831866 or michelle@ftv.co.za

My new Snow Patrol favorite

Two weeks later like a surplus reprieve
I found a hair the length of yours on my sleeve
I wound it round and round my finger so tight
It turned purple and a pulse formed inside

And i knew the beat 'cause it matched your own beat
I still remember it from our chest to chest and feet to feet
The easy silence then was a sweet relief to this hush
Of ovens, aeroplanes and of distant car horns

A fire a fire, you can only take what you can carry
A pulse your pulse, it's the only thing i can remember
I break you don't, i was always set to self-destruct though
The fire the fire, it cracks and barks like primal music

I said i knew the beat 'cause it matched your own beat
Find more lyrics at www.kovideo.net
It's become my engine my own source of heat
The sea between us only amplifies the sound waves
Every hum and echo and crash paints my cave

A fire a fire, you can only take what you can carry
A pulse your pulse, it's the only thing i can remember
I break you don't, i was always set to self-destruct though
The fire the fire, it cracks and barks like primal music

A fire a fire, you can only take what you can carry
A pulse your pulse, it's the only thing i can remember
I break you don't, i was always set to self-destruct though
The fire the fire, it cracks and barks like primal music

Words and Speech

At the end of the day, there are some things you just can't help but talk about. Some things we just don't want to hear, and some things we say because we can't be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they're what you do. Some things you say cause there's no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves.

Sasha's F1 GP update - 28 April 2009

Taking nothing away from Jenson Button’s excellent drive and victory in Bahrain, I am still wondering how Toyota as well as Sebastien Vettel lost the race!

I say this because Toyota had the front row locked out and Vettel who was 3rd had the heaviest fuel load after qualifying.

Well, it is this simple. Toyota mucked up badly. They chose the wrong tyres for the middle stint of the race. It is that simple. Note to Toyota: use the quickest tyres for the MAJORITY of the race and not the other way around.

For Vettel it was a little more complicated. He didn’t get the ideal track position after the start and had to play a long waiting game which thwarted his progress.

For the rest it was a pretty ordinary race which should have been a cracker but Toyota messed it up to be honest.

The first “normal” race of the season and without a doubt it must be said that the Brawn GP cars have a significant advantage over the rest of the field. What must worry the rest of the teams is that in two weeks time Brawn will introduce their FIRST updates on their car. I would be concerned if I were the other teams.

The Bahrain GP saw Button extend his lead in the championship and you have to believe that both he and the team are now seriously thinking about this championship. For Barrichello he might already have to fulfil a role he plays so well, that being second.

Button made a crucial pass on Hamilton at the end of the first lap after Hamilton bulleted off the line at the start with the help of KERS. This set him up for the race. The Toyota pair were well in the lead but the wrong strategy saw them fall behind although Trulli finished a great 3rd but it SHOULD have been a win. Trulli also managed his first ever fastest lap of the race.

Vettel was held up behind Lewis Hamilton and his race was marginalised after an average start. Hamilton did his best and showed his class finishing a great 4th. I expect McLaren to strongly improve over the next 2 races however it all depends what kind of penalty they receive on Wed at the WMSC meeting. I predict a slap on the wrists and a little fine. Although nothing is little in F1.

Rubens Barrichello fought back bravely and finished 5th with Ferrari’s Kimi Raikkonen scoring his first points and the first points for Ferrari this season. Ferrari is struggling with everything but it is mainly their Aero package which doesn’t give them enough grip in the corners. This then spills over and ruins their tyres. Perhaps they will improve in Spain but I don’t expect anything too dramatic to be honest.

Glock fought back hard but only managed to finish 7th. Alonso drove hard and nearly fainted after the race. His 8th place and one point is not enough for him or Renault and they too have a mountain to climb.

The disappointment of the race has to be the performance of BMW. What has gone wrong? Even though both drivers had problems early on, watching them during the race showed that their race pace was below what we have come to expect from this team.

One last thing: what race were Jonathan Legard and Martin Brundle watching? The commentary was so off the pace. These guys are meant to keep us informed about how the race is panning out? I was in the studio with Gary and Vic and we were screaming at the TV because the two BBc’ers were getting it completely wrong. Maybe I am just too much of a perfectionist when it comes to F1 but I believe the average F1 punter could have been better informed about what was going on during the race.

I will let you know what happens on Wed with McLaren and of course any other major F1 news.

Bring on Europe and the Spanish GP.

Take care

Ciao Ciao

Sex on Fire - Unplugged by Graeme from Idols

Miss FTV Africa 2009 - Grand Finale

Months of preparation and excitement culminated Saturday night at the Theatre of Marcellus, Emperors Palace with Durbanite Priyeshka Lutchman winning the coveted title of Miss FTV Africa 2009.

Eighteen stunning finalists took to the stage and stunned audiences with elegant and fashionable designs created by well-known designers such as David Tlale, Abigail Keats, Earth Child and Heni.

Priyeshka is a dynamic energetic 16 year old, who enjoys challenges, meeting people and interacting with others. At the age of 15, she was chosen to represent South Africa at the National Freedom Day celebrations held in Mumbai and Delhi, India. “Being exposed to the competitive world of the modelling industry has taught me to set high standards for myself,” says Lutchman. “I am determined to be successful and winning Miss FTV Africa 2009 is a step in the right direction. I’m excited about the possible future that winning the title will bring.”

The glittering finale boasted the who’s who of the fashion and entertainment industry, with the likes of many celebrities attending.

Jan Malan Umzingeli, South Africa’s best known show production company, entertained audiences with an electrifying fashion extravaganza with the theme: Fashion 101.

Fashion TV is proud of the event and the excitement that it brought to the fashion industry. Priyeshka represents what the FTV brand stands for, and we wish her the best of luck for the end of the year.